I have been single for a long time now. Yes, I went on dates every couple of days. However, a committed relationship was not in the picture for some years. And, I had no regrets. Rather, I liked my personal space and wasn’t sure if I was ready for something serious. That was until I realized being single during the pandemic could be a little harder than it looks. I always frowned upon people who thought being single was a curse. Quite frankly, for me it was liberating. But, then Covid hit the streets and I was locked up in my apartment all alone. Not only did I have a lot of office work on my plate, but also had to do so much of household work, all on my own. Here is my tale of being single during the pandemic and how I turned it around for myself.
Did the days get longer?
When the lockdown was first announced, I was overjoyed. The first few days were all about doing things that I desired to, but never had the time to. Cooking, catching up on some football, going through my old video games and the whole lot. However, a week into the lockdown, being single started creeping up on me. “Do the days have more than 24 hours now”?, was a constant thought.
Since I was no longer travelling to work or meeting my friends on a daily basis (I am a social butterfly), I had a lot of time in hand. After the initial excitement of dabbling into different things settled, I kept asking myself, now what? Well, that’s when I decided to pay a little attention to my mental health. The time I usually spent travelling, I invested in some mindfulness exercises and sessions, because I felt I could really use some positive vibes.
It’s Ok to Desire Companionship
I was always of the opinion that I am a strong independent woman. I never felt the need for a man to complete me. And, being single was a part of my freedom and independence. The pandemic came as a wake up call for me that a relationship is not only about completing a person. Rather, it is more about companionship and having someone to share your emotions and feelings with. I always donned a strong face that I didn’t need anyone. But, the pandemic made me realize that it is ok to desire companionship. It is fine to want someone who you can share the little things in life. It is not a sign of the weak. Rather signifies strength that you believe in yourself enough to open up to the other person.
Single doesn’t mean Alone
Another rather interesting part of being single during the pandemic was receiving calls from long lost relatives and aunties to check on my wellbeing. While I am sure they meant the best, however, hearing, “You should have married a year ago, you wouldn’t have been facing this distress alone.” Undoubtedly, I appreciate their concern, but why did they assume that being single equals being alone? I can’t thank my friends enough for regularly checking up on me like I did on them. Yes, I was desiring companionship, but not because I was alone. I think it was just because I hadn’t moved out of the house in what felt like forever. Maybe seeing another human soul was all that I needed.
Technology to the Rescue
One thing that I can’t thank enough throughout my journey of being single during the pandemic was the various technological innovations that surround us. Right from a morning call from my mom to ensure I am out of bed and ready for my day ahead, to beyond work video calls with my boss, just checking on my wellbeing, everything was possible because of technology. In fact, I feel my social life is also back with so many virtual dinners that I have with my friends.
In addition to connecting with my friends, I did dabble across a few dating apps and kid you not, I came across some wonderful men. They had similar thoughts about being single. Some conversations about how they were dealing with the pandemic really came out as revelations for me. The best being the use of a range of mindfulness and wellness apps to prevent any anxiety that might crop up.
Being Single: Love is on the Way
One of the final stories from being single during the pandemic is definitely that this is a tough time, but we need to fight the anxiety as much as we can. On multiple days, I thought of getting married to the first person I meet after the lockdown, just to have a companion at all times. But, it was my anxiety talking. My greatest learning has been that the pandemic has been hard on everyone, be it singles or couples. It’s just how you deal with it makes a difference. The bottom line is, if you feel you need a companion, check out the great line of men and women on some wonderful online matchmaking platforms like WeHitched and start an organic relationship because you want to, not just because you don’t want to die single!